I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
