fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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