It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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