Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
