We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
