I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
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He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
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I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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