AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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