I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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