last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
he had hair everywhere except his balls
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.