Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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