he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
