Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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