Three words: puerto rican gang bang
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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