ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
