I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
