If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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