In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
