She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
