i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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