just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I just found puke in my bra..
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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