okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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