I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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