her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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