No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
