i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card