I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize