For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
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WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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