well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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