Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
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Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
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those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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