was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize