she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Operation Purity has been aborted
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Did you pee in the oven last night??
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
