I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I think people are normalizing furries
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