There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize