No awkward lesbian experiences without me
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences In Dating Men And Women
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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