They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms