i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
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