At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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