My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize