Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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