Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I currently don't understand fingers.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
