Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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