I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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