would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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