I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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