i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
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He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
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Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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