oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I have demons in me.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
