I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
