so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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