Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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