Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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