so explain again why im purple
no
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
