I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
