drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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